saddness

                                Everyday I have been thinking what will happen if i disappear in this world will the people around me be sad or happy, this few days i have observe the people around me and i finally have the answer for my family and relatives. The answer is they are not sad at all as if i disappear in this world they would not be able to pay a lot money for my illness and the trouble that i have made, although the teachers in riverside treat me well but i can tell that they are afraid that i would faint i know that they care for me but i don't think i deserve this kind of careness.

                                     For the other hand which is my friends i have observe some but i don't know how to face them as u know that they are quarrel about the friendship, and i have to stuck at the middle of them so i really don't know what to do any more i am really sad i wish that maybe if i disappear in this world they are happy.

my weekend

Today, 12 of August in the morning i have a mother tongue common test paper, i am nervous, scared and wondering will i pass the papers? But i gather all the courage and the effort that i have been studying all this days, and the days that i have been concentrate in class. Finally, the mother tongue common test has finish, but there are still test coming towards me it was mother tongue listening comprehension and one English grammar test. 

I have been telling myself never to give up even though there have been difficult thought in my head. even though there are friendship difficult, i will not let my brain go other places while i takes the common test. i promised myself never to give up as i want to go to the same class as my friends, but you will never know what happen in the future.

not feeling well today

                            Today, 5th of Augest, at school i suddenly feel like sleep and then once recess start i went to eat afterwards i went to the back ally to rest my eyes even though it is not that comfortable but i get to rest a little. Later i felt that i am geeting the way of my friends as they are getting along so much. i wanted to  do something for them but i could not as i don't know what they are thinking. once they think about a thing i could not understand a thing.

                          As i keep on thinking this matter my head is spinning around and round, even though my head is spining but i am also worry about them as their quarrel will not end for 100 years no matter what they do nobody wants to let each other a way.

my life forever

                                  Today, 31 of July 2011, i am sick but not so good so i have rest but once i think about the things in school i can't help it but cry. once i remember on Friday 29 of July my friends julia have cry in class at that time i really don't know what to do at all i wish to lent her my shoulder so that she would not feel left out but i am such a failures. but i have been thinking what should i do if my friends once ever cry again what will i do? so i think if i can give up my life so they would not fight and would not cry any more i am willing to give up my life, and if i die i rather they make up together than i will blame myself as i know this is worth.

                               but i also do not want any one to be sad or cry if i had die because it will not be worth so i wish everyone not to be sad or crying that is my motive.

the worse day of my life

Today, 23 july 2011 i have been thinking a lot today as at night my mother suddenly say somethingi feel like crying. which is :

when she say it will be better if she has not born the three of us and say whether she can put us back into her stomach.

This sentence really hurt my heart and i felt like crying than i think surely later when i grow up have work she will treat us differently because maybe she would scared we may not give her the money that we are supposed to.

I feel so sad, i had also wish that i am not in this world because everyone thinks i am a eyesore and this days i feel that i am being left out. I don't want this feeling anymore.

pleasant day for me

                                    I have thought that today might be a unlucky day for me , as i have been very sad and angry because i have dream. It was all about in primary school what was happening, i feel that i need to cry but if i cry my eyes might be sore so i did not cry. after going to school, i feel that i am very sad because my friends aren't getting along. i wish someone would cut me into half and so that the two group of my friends can get a half of me. but no one wanted to cut me into half and i have no ideas how am i going to do. 

                                  But later teachers have been calling us to turn back to talk about the thing that teacher have been giving us the paper that have the question wondering is this a unlucky day for me, but i am wrong i indeed have a very pleasant in my life even though my friends isn't getting along but i will be by my side forever i believes they think so too.

my June holiday

                           Today, 25 of June i have a exciting day. I have help my parents to do a lot in the morning and had McDonald as my breakfast and had ice-Milo. Thinking that drinking cold drinks, we might have stomach-ache, but i drink it without thinking other things in my mind. After all those cleaning, my father drives us to my grandparents house, after reaching home i immediately open the computer and saw the show and to Facebook to check things. Wondering whether the timetable have change a lot of my classmate have been asking, whether who knows what is they timetable now has it change?

After that my mother came back early as my grandmother is going to a funeral which i wanted to go, but all she could do is only saying cannot or no. So my grandmother immediately come back to bath and change clothes and so went out, so later we went down to buy some food for me, my two sister and my maid. Than finally we watch channel 5 'underdog'.